A dear friend of mine recently posted on Facebook a very thoughtful and well-written essay about her son and his football career. Laura is a busy mother of 5 children and I have always admired her ability to "do it all" so well! Her essay made me think about my word choices and assumptions I make about my own kids. Our lives change dramatically as our children get older; we find ourselves so caught up in the drama of parenting a teenager that sometimes we forget to just be proud.
I, personally, get tired of hearing how terrible “kids are today.” Most of the teens I meet are pretty darn good kids doing their best in a weird world. I think they’re awesome. And yes, I think Jonathan – and his mom – are pretty awesome too.
By Laura Zanga
When our kids are young, it’s very easy to show them off and brag. As they get older, it becomes more difficult. It’s not that there are necessarily less things we are proud of, it’s we feel a little uncomfortable with talking about them to others. We don't want to come across as the boasting parent and God forbid we "one up" any of our friends kids.
Growing up I never heard my mom boast about any of us. It just wasn't her. She did, however, tell me once that she really didn't want to hear about other people's kids so why should she bore them with her kid’s little anecdotes? Fair enough, I suppose but at the same time why deny yourself that one little moment when you really have something special to share. That's just what I am going to do.
For the last 10 weeks I have sat in the stands watching my son Jonathan's team get beat every Friday night and for a mother sitting there week after week let me tell you it was rough. Five out of the 10 games they lost by a touchdown or less. Boys (including Jon) were playing both offense and defense some games because there wasn't enough players.
There were a few games I actually had to leave early because I just couldn't take it. One or two games I wanted to cry. Now I know that may seem silly and a bit pathetic to some. I get that, but when you have a son like mine who is quiet, never really expresses himself, it’s hard because you really don't know how much he hurts or how disappointed he really is. But, what he did show me these last 2 1/2 months is a kid with a lot of character, self-confidence and loyalty.
The past few years Jon has been banged up with bruised ribs, an injured hip that required therapy, and a concussion. But he never once complained, never once was late for practice and never missed a practice or game, even when he was hurt and couldn't play. What I saw was a kid that not only got hurt on the field but off the field as well (especially this past season) by his school mates and even some friends. I must admit even his dad and I made comments about the coach. His response to me was "mom you don't know him. He's good to us, takes care of the players and mom, he's a good Christian man."
Well, talk about putting me in my place. I've never said another word about his coaches again. If Jonathan gained nothing else from this whole experience, what he did gain was the privilege of being coached by someone he respected. I told Joe a few weeks back I wasn't going to miss this. I lied. I will miss very much seeing my kid run across the field, miss very much the talks about the next week’s game and seeing him all dressed up in his good clothes on game day. Even the smelly, muddy, practice clothes will be missed. I will miss it all because it was a big part of Jon's last 6 years and a big part of who my son is.
The young Man he has become.
I'm proud of you, Jonathan and I'm not ashamed to say it!
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